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  My body was a symphony of sensations and I could barely breathe. I gasped as he lowered his head to my breast and flicked my nipple with his tongue. The nipple hardened, and when he did it again, the throb between my legs grew to an aching need.

  Oh, I was completely sure I wanted to do this. I’d never been more sure in my life.

  I’d also never been more sure, with a horrible sinking feeling, that I didn’t have any condoms.

  “Asher,” I said. “Do you have protection? Because I don’t.”

  He lifted his head to look at me, realization dawning on his face. He lay his forehead against my chest with a groan.

  “I wasn’t exactly planning for this kind of thing,” he said into my rib cage. Then he inhaled deeply and pressed a kiss to my skin which gave me shivers again. “You smell so good,” he murmured.

  “I wasn’t either,” I said. “Obviously.” I ran my hands through his hair—it was so soft and thick. “Fuuuuuuck.”

  “Not tonight,” Asher said. “No glove, no love.” And that totally made me smile. He kissed me softly. Which only made it worse because I was getting all tingly again, and it was my turn to groan. He laughed and said, “Shopping trip tomorrow?”

  “YES,” I said, and kissed him again. “This officially sucks, you know?”

  “I don’t know,” he said wickedly. “I’ve got this whole gorgeous playground here to myself. I can think of ways to still have fun.” And then he crushed his mouth to mine, leaning forward so far I tipped backwards until I was laying down and he was above me. He pulled away from my mouth, grinned at my breathless expression, then slowly blazed a trail of kisses down my chest and stomach, turning me molten inside. He ran his tongue along the skin at the top of my panties and slipped his fingers under the band to tug them down enough to expose another inch.

  He kissed his way down, inch by slow inch, until he was sliding my panties over my hips and all the way down my legs. My breath was ragged as he kissed his way up my inner thigh and paused, breathing right above my ache. The warmth of his breath made me gasp. He smiled and kissed his way up the inside of my other thigh, slowly, tauntingly, pausing again when he reached my core.

  He was driving me insane. I was ready. I wanted him to take me in his mouth. I needed it like I needed air.

  “Please,” I breathed. “Please, Asher.”

  He smiled, and made this half growl low in his throat. “I’ve been imagining doing this,” he said, “ever since our first night in Venice.” He held my gaze as he lowered his mouth to take me in, his tongue flicking lightly. His mouth was warm and wet, and it didn’t take very long before he’d rocked me to heights I’d never reached before.

  When I came down from the high, he was gazing at me in wonder. “You’re so beautiful, Skye. I could do that again and again just to watch you.”

  I covered my face, but couldn’t hide my grin.

  “What?” he said. “Don’t be embarrassed. It was incredibly sexy. You are incredibly sexy.”

  The thing was, Blaine had tried to do that occasionally, but it had rarely worked, and when it did…well, it was nice (because an orgasm was always a good thing), but it wasn’t oh-my-god amazing like just now. I had honestly never felt anything like that. I mean, my toes were still tingling several minutes after the fact and I had yet to get the feeling completely back in my legs.

  He slid up alongside me under the covers, and then smiled in surprise as I slipped out of his arms.

  “You’re not the only one who gets to play,” I said, and watched as his muscles tightened when I slowly kissed my way down his chest to his stomach. He moaned deliciously as I teased him with my tongue, and flat-out gasped when I slid his boxers off and grazed him with my lips.

  And when he came, his cries were so vulnerable that I wanted to wrap my arms around him and never let go. He whispered my name over and over again, his hands pulling me back up to him, his bare chest against mine, our skin touching from head to toe. He kissed me deeply, softly. Then I lay my head on his shoulder and breathed him in. I couldn’t remember the last time I felt this content, this whole.

  This…at home.

  fourteen

  I woke first the next morning, my face just inches from his. I lay there without moving and watched him sleep. I wasn’t trying to be a creeper—and, yes, it occurred to me that if he opened his eyes to me staring at him, that might come across as a little freaky—but I wanted to study him, see what he looked like when all of his defenses were down, when he was completely vulnerable.

  He looked younger, the lines of his face softened. And the sadness he carried—even when he joked or laughed you could still see it—was gone. I liked him without the sadness, and then felt horrible for thinking that. He was entitled to it. It was a part of who he was. But I hated that he was in pain and there was nothing I could do to help.

  I rolled away from him and stretched, realizing that I’d actually slept the entire night—something that hadn’t happened for months as my anxiety over the wedding had grown. And I hadn’t noticed that I’d still been sleeping like crap even after I’d left it all behind.

  So I felt well rested for the first time in forever. With a tiny smile, I wondered if what he’d done to me last night had anything to do with it. Cure for insomnia! And I almost laughed out loud even as I was blushing furiously.

  “You look happy this morning,” he said, and I jumped, not realizing he’d woken up. God, he’d seen me grinning about last night and probably knew exactly what I’d been thinking. Which only made me blush more.

  “Come on,” he said, his dimples sinking deliciously into his cheeks as he grinned wickedly at me. “Let’s get breakfast before we go shopping.”

  I watched him get out of bed and reach for his clothes. He caught me staring and his smile widened as I blushed even redder. But I couldn’t help looking—I was not about to miss an opportunity like this when he was all bare skin and beautiful. And he looked so, um, happy to see me in the morning. My eyes drifted to his erection, then up to his eyes, and I wouldn’t have been able to contain my smile if I’d tried.

  I sat up, letting the sheet fall to my waist, watching feral hunger fill his eyes. If we didn’t both get dressed quickly, it was very likely I would take my chances without the condoms, and that was Not a Good Idea. Doing my best to ignore the feel of his gaze on my naked skin, I turned away and pulled on my clothes.

  “I’m clean,” Asher said. I stopped, t-shirt only partway on, and stared at him. “I got tested a few months ago, just to be sure, but I’ve always used condoms. Every time.” He paused. “I just thought you should know.”

  Wow. No talking around the subject for him. I was momentarily stunned—Blaine had never liked talking about it, and trying to get information out of him had been next to impossible. I’d finally demanded that he get tested before we did anything and show me the results.

  “Yeah, no, that’s good,” I said, and then did a mental facepalm. “I mean, I am too. I haven’t been tested, but I’ve only been with one guy—Blaine, obviously—and we always used condoms.” I shook my head. “Not that he didn’t try to change that. But I’m impressed—you with the testing and condoms.”

  “Well, my mom’s a nurse,” Asher said, “and when Josh and I were in middle school, she got out one of her medical textbooks and showed us pictures of what various venereal diseases look like.”

  “NO—” I started laughing. “—WAY.”

  “Photographs,” he said, laughing now, too. “Of REAL people.”

  “Oh. My. God.”

  “Probably the single most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen. Scared the shit out of me. I was afraid to even kiss a girl for the longest time.”

  “Wow. That’s just…WOW.”

  “I know. And then she made us look at them again once a year until I was a junior in college.”

  “Your mom loves you.”

  “Yeah,” he said, his laughter fading into a warm smile. “She really does.”

  A li
ttle while later, as we sat at the café in the piazza, Alessandro stopped by to say hello. I sipped my cappuccino as he talked about the vineyards in Barolo and insisted on taking us on a tour. Like we could turn that down—yes, we had PLANS, but we were in Italy. We needed to immerse ourselves every opportunity we got. So half an hour later we were headed toward the medieval castle at the top of town. Alessandro told us it had been turned into a wine museum to celebrate the town’s revered red wine.

  I tried to listen to Alessandro, I really did, but every time I looked at Asher, all I could think about was where his tongue had been and how much I was looking forward to tonight, so I spent the entire morning horny as hell.

  Alessandro led us through rows upon rows of grape vines. The plants were bushy with leaves, but not grapes yet. I think he said it was too early in the season. It was gorgeous out on that hill—the sky was clear and we could see for miles. And it was vineyards everywhere for as far as I could see.

  “Everything here is wine. All business is wine,” Alessandro said.

  “It’s so beautiful,” I said. “Have you lived here all your life?”

  “Si,” said Alessandro. “I grow up here. It’s the most beautiful place in the world. I never leave.”

  “I can understand that,” Asher said, but he was looking at me when he spoke and he squeezed my hand. My heart did a little flip and my mind went right back to last night and the purchase we planned to make today.

  We asked Alessandro where the pharmacy was.

  “You sick?” he said. “You need doctor?”

  “No,” I said, heat flooding my face as I tried to think of some non-condom related reason we’d need to go to the pharmacy. But my mind was too busy being mortified that this sweet little old man might guess our true purpose.

  “We just need to pick up things for our first aid kit,” Asher said. “You know, like bandages and aspirin.” Thank god one of us was good on their feet. And as soon as I thought that, all I could wonder was whether Asher was good on his feet. Visions of showering with him filled my head and my whole body started tingling as I tried to bring my focus back to what Alessandro was saying. Again.

  Instead of giving directions, he insisted on taking us there. In growing horror, I imagined him going inside with us and then we’d have to buy bandaids and aspirin and leave without condoms.

  I NEEDED THOSE CONDOMS.

  But as soon as we got there, Alessandro bid us goodbye and went on his way. I swear I breathed an actual sigh of relief.

  We stood outside the door for a moment. Asher squeezed my hand and I turned to him. He raised his eyebrows at me, a silent question, and I nodded.

  Yes, yes, yes. I wanted this. I didn’t want to overthink it. I didn’t want to think about the future. I just wanted to go with what was happening. See where life took me while I was free to do so. We had two months. That was the entire lifespan of some relationships. Well, not for me. I’d always ended up in longer relationships so I hadn’t actually dated all that many people. But Paige had dated some guys for two months or less. She’d gone through a ton of boyfriends.

  Asher held the door for me and we went inside. As we walked slowly around the store, serious disappointment started to settle in my stomach because we weren’t finding anything even remotely resembling a box of condoms.

  “I think we’re going to have to ask,” Asher said.

  I looked at him. “Do you know the Italian word for condom?”

  He smiled. “I don’t think that was in my guidebook.”

  “Me neither. So how are you going to ask?”

  “I’m hoping someone will speak English.”

  “And if they don’t?”

  He just grinned at me and I started shaking my head. “You know what?” I said, backing away. “I think I’m gonna wait outside.” And I turned and walked quickly to the door without looking back.

  “Chicken!” he called after me, laughing.

  Hell, yes, I was chicken. I was not about to try to mime condom. I didn’t want to even think about what that would look like. So I ran outside and found a bit of wall to lean against in the shade. There was a rose bush growing up through the cobblestones, right alongside the wall. It looked strangely out of place because the streets and walls were all stone. There were no yards inside the town, no trees lining the streets or gardens to admire.

  Yet here was this lone plant that had pushed its way through somehow and was blossoming. And it made me think that maybe anything was possible. Maybe my life didn’t have to be predetermined by my mother. Maybe she’d listen to me.

  Of course, that meant I’d have to talk to her.

  People passed me, nodding and saying “Buon giorno” and “Ciao Bella,” and I smiled in return. I loved the friendliness here. I could see myself living in a place like this, knowing everyone in town. There was just something really comforting about being known, and here, it seemed, everyone was. Back home, I lived in a town of strangers.

  Hands were suddenly on either side of my head and my view was filled with Asher. He pressed his body the full length of mine and kissed me breathless. The cool of the stone wall behind me juxtaposed deliciously with Asher’s heat. I could feel his hardness growing between us, which just made me ache. When he lifted his head, his eyes locked on my lips, my heart raced. All I could think was if that pharmacy was out, we were going to need to hop on a bus TODAY because I didn’t think I could wait another night to have him.

  “So?” I said.

  He nodded.

  “Thank GOD,” I said, and he laughed at that and kissed me again. “How did it go?”

  “Well, the pharmacist didn’t speak English.” He slung his arm around my shoulders as we headed back toward our room. We couldn’t get there fast enough as far as I was concerned.

  “Oh no. So what did you do?”

  “I had to…act out what I needed.” And he burst out laughing.

  “Oh my god,” I said, laughing too, as I felt my face flushing at the thought. “Embarrassment much?”

  He looked at me sideways, pulled me into him, and kissed the side of my forehead. “Worth it.”

  And my stomach dropped. I glanced at him—he was still laughing—and I couldn’t help but wonder how did I get here? How did I get this lucky? Maybe all the crap in my life leading up to meeting Asher was a kind of prepayment in life currency.

  Maybe I actually deserved this.

  I slipped my arm around his waist and held onto him as we walked.

  “There’s a problem with this town,” I said as we passed some shops.

  “Seriously?”

  “They’re not going to have any tacky souvenirs here. Everything’s too nice.”

  “That’s true,” he said, looking very resolute. “But you know where I stand on that Quest.”

  “Well, then,” I said, “If I agree with you—and, yes, it’s looking like I’m going to have to—then I think we need a new one. They’re addictive.”

  “I’ve always felt the same way,” he said. “So did Josh. But these things can’t be rushed. We have to wait for the Quest to present itself.”

  “Boy, you certainly have a lot of rules.”

  “It’s not me,” he said, “it’s the Quest.” As we neared the market, he turned to me. “What would you say to a picnic in our room? Fruit, cheese, and bread?”

  “I’d say, Yes, please!” I nodded and he said he’d get it, that he wanted me to wait outside. So as he went in the different little shops, I checked messages. There was a text from my brother wanting an update.

  ME: Update: Am in little Italian town. STOP Never coming home. STOP

  JUSTIN: You’re such a dork. You can’t TEXT a telegram to someone.

  ME: I just did!! I’m a trailblazer!

  JUSTIN: Sounds like you’re having fun.

  ME: YES. Seriously, I may never come home. Will work for food.

  JUSTIN: You wish.

  ME: Sometimes. How are things?

  JUSTIN: You mean Mom?
<
br />   ME: Yeah. And you.

  JUSTIN: She’s a little ballistic because some guy hung up on her with your phone. What was that about?

  ME: LONG story. But he’s a friend-slash-travel buddy-slash-really great guy. How ballistic are we talking?

  JUSTIN: Nearing apoplectic, I’d say. Wild eyes and practically foaming at the mouth. (Kidding.) (But not really. She’s PISSED.) Thank you, again!

  ME: HAHA. Okay, happier subject: What’s new with you?

  JUSTIN: I got a summer job.

  ME: Where?

  JUSTIN: New bistro that just opened. Working in the kitchen.

  ME: Good!

  JUSTIN: Not sure about that, but it’s money.

  Asher appeared at my side. “Ready?” he said. He had a bag full of stuff and was looking at me like food was the last thing on his mind.

  Oh yeah, I was ready.

  ME: Gotta run. Am being kidnapped by cute Italian boys. Do NOT send help.

  JUSTIN: Haha. Have fun, Skye.

  ME: I intend to. Love you!

  I slipped the phone back into my pocket. “I was just chatting with my little brother.”

  Asher smiled at that as we walked.

  “What?” I said.

  “You’re close with your brother.”

  “Yeah,” I said. “How did you know?”

  “You had this great little smile on your face as you were texting him.” He shifted the bag to his other arm and slipped his hand in mine. Then he sighed. “It just makes me like you more.”

  Yeah, there was no chance of me not falling for Asher.

  And just as I was starting to imagine what it might take to get Asher to cancel his London plans, that’s when I got a text from Paige.

  fifteen

  PAIGE: Breaking news! Text me when you get this.

  We’d just gotten back to our room, and I sat down on the bed as I started typing a response.

  “Your brother again?” Asher said.

  “Nope. It’s Paige.” I glanced over at him pulling our food out of the bag and smiled. “I’ll be done in a minute.”